I realised something.
I realised that from the day Adrian put his other commitments before me, no one is placing me as their first priority anymore, NOT A SINGLE person... I no longer feel like I'm the 'someone' anymore.
I know my parents had always been placing me first, but the 'first' is shared among others as well, like my brother... I need a concentrated 'FIRST'.
I know how demanding I can get XD It's just something I've longed for and I got it once but have lost it now...
Well, I also have close friends, like REALLY CLOSE, but that friend just couldn't place me first as well. Please get me right, I'm not blaming or putting fault in anyone because I know that everyone has got their own commitment and their priorities are really on their very own discretion. Strictly not to be questioned.
I just feel so troubled and I'm trying to find myself again in such life, a life where no one's able to give me the concentrated 'FIRST'.
I realised that from the day Adrian put his other commitments before me, no one is placing me as their first priority anymore, NOT A SINGLE person... I no longer feel like I'm the 'someone' anymore.
I know my parents had always been placing me first, but the 'first' is shared among others as well, like my brother... I need a concentrated 'FIRST'.
I know how demanding I can get XD It's just something I've longed for and I got it once but have lost it now...
Well, I also have close friends, like REALLY CLOSE, but that friend just couldn't place me first as well. Please get me right, I'm not blaming or putting fault in anyone because I know that everyone has got their own commitment and their priorities are really on their very own discretion. Strictly not to be questioned.
I just feel so troubled and I'm trying to find myself again in such life, a life where no one's able to give me the concentrated 'FIRST'.
2 comments:
its not about being in the top of being in the priority list some times..
i know how sucky it can be when you needed someone to talk to or just to get soem attention, but thats life...
even myself have to go through that at times..
and, thing might not be as what you see from the surface...
get more understanding, then you would know...
i am sure...
I've geen trying to be as understanding as I could, but I still feel so out of reach!
Sometimes, I just feel like reaching out but then I realised that I've really got no one to reach out to T_T
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